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  • What I Wish I Had Said

    When the Telemarketer Called


    Am: "Hello".

    Telemarketer: "Hello, this is Clearly a Pane Windows. We'll have a team in your area all the rest of this week. What day would you prefer to have us stop by to give you a free estimate?"

    Am: "Raul? Is this Raul Slimesucker? The son of Sally Slimesucker and some unidentified member of a prison work detail? I haven't heard from you in weeks, Raul."

    Tm: "I'm not Raul. Uh, do you want ... ."

    Am: "Are you sure you're not Raul? You really sound like a Slimesucker bastard to me."

    Tm: *CLICK*

    Anyway, now you know where I think telemarketers come from.

    Message Board

  • Converting Xanga to LiveJournal

    The Manual Steps Required

    Automation Will Come Later


    I went back to my very first Xanga Weblog entry and downloaded it, comments included, and looked at it with BlueFish, the program I use for editing HTML. There is a lot of junk there, most of which isn't very useful.

    There are several scripts, all of which can be eliminated. There are lots of tables nested within one another. The only tables that have any value at all are the ones that display your chosen heading block. You can boilerplate that, simplifying it in the process. Little is left of any real value beyond the text and any image links you included when writing the entry initially. That and the posting date, which is now correctly translated to your location if you have told Xanga which time zone to use.

    Being cautious, I stripped away the superfluous material in two stages. I left the tables and fonts the first time. Then I saved the working version I got from being conservative and just removed everything but the text. That left me with two HTML files, both of which displayed roughly the same thing, my original Weblog entry without the eProps, ads, links and other stuff and, especially, without the wide margin to the left.

    Then I tried to copy the HTML to LiveJournal. LiveJournal didn't like that. I was able to copy the displayed text but not the code. Still, I was able to make a LiveJournal entry with the text from that initial Xanga entry and backdate it to the original date it was posted.

    I wanted my heading text block included, so I made a simplified HTML table with just that text and tried copying it into the LiveJournal in an Edit session. It worked! That surprised me. Maybe it only accepts small pastes. I'll have to find out what the limits are if I'm going to automate this thing.

    I have a three-ring binder in which I've been saving copies of some of my entries. I've always been annoyed by having to print all of the extra stuff Xanga includes that wastes paper. Now that I know what to keep and what to eliminate, I can quickly edit pages for printing and save myself a bunch of paper. Automating that part of the process shouldn't be difficult at all.

  • Cheap Reusable Spacecraft

    A Private Enterprise Effort


    The newspaper this morning had a story about a company in Mojave that has developed a small space plane capable of carrying three people 100 kilometers up into space and returning, then being reused almost immediately. This rocket plane will be launched from a slightly larger jet plane designed for that purpose.

    If they can make two launches to the specified altitude within a two week period they will win a ten million dollar prize. It cost more than that to develop the two vehicles, of course, but the prize wasn't their real motivation. They say they are doing it because it seems like a fun thing to do.

    They can probably make money with their space plane, though. Lots of rich people will want to go into space, if only for a few hours, and they may well be capable of ferrying people to the space station. At the very least, a variation on the space plane could be left at the space station as an emergency escape vehicle.

    The space plane doesn't have the heating problems faced by the shuttles because of its feather-weight design. It has a pop-up tail sail that allows it to rapidly shed velocity on re-entry without generating large amounts of energy in the form of heat. Modern composite materials are the secret behind the extremely light weight of the spacecraft.

    The space plane hasn't actually flown yet, although the launch vehicle has flown several times to altitudes and speeds that exceed the specifications for the prize. Flights will take place when the company is ready. They can afford to take their time because it is a hobby thing. There are no deadlines.

    It wasn't being kept a secret. They just didn't have anybody assigned to create publicity. Nor should they waste money on publicity; they will get plenty of free publicity when they actually start going into space on a low budget basis.

    This is an example of what can be done when you don't allow the government to become involved.

  • Wine


    I once had a collection of wines. They weren't the best wines in the world but they were aging nicely and improving in value as they improved in taste. But when I left the United States for an extended period I left the wines with my sister, for safekeeping. She and her husband drank them all, about five cases of dessert wines and ten or twelve cases of red wines. There were some white wines, but they probably would have aged past their peak if not consumed anyway.

    You can keep a white wine up to about five years before it starts to go downhill, and it becomes unpleasant to drink after about eight years. Red wines start to deteriorate at about ten years, becoming useless after fifteen or so. Dessert wines may continue improving for decades and will keep almost forever -- well, a couple of centuries, anyway. That is a very rough generalization and there are many exceptions. Some wines aren't worth aging at all, especially champaigns, rosés and early wines.

    Everything I've mentioned so far applies mostly to wines made exclusively from grapes, but wine can be made from anything that has a natural sugar content, including milk.

    Wine made from milk is called "koumis", and I made some once, mostly out of curiosity. It is simple enough to do: start with a certified raw skim milk, add yeast culture and mix well, cap with a wine lock device to keep the air out (an ordinary balloon works well enough), allow it to reach room temperature and wait for about four to six hours. It tastes very yeasty.

    Wine made from honey is called mead. Many meads from northern Europe are sickingly sweet, but you can make a dry mead that is very pleasant.

    I once met a Navy cook who made his wines out of carrot peels and tomatoes scavanged from the mess using the bulk bread yeast from the mess. He claimed it really tasted pretty good and he had an endless supply. The wine would brew for two or three days and age for five or six days, so he would have up to ten batches in various stages, making one batch each day and consuming up to two batches in a day when they were ready.

    Living in Panama gave me a chance to experiment with some unusual fruits for wines. There were lots of fruits growing wild or available free that worked well and many that didn't. Citrus fruits are too acid. Mangoes are too messy to work with, althought they might have produced an interesting wine. I didn't try the really obvious ones like bananas. I didn't have much luck with raspberries but my cranberry wine was interesting (it had the curious property that two glasses would put almost anybody to sleep). But the fruit I had the best luck with was the cashew.

    The cashew nut grows inside a leathery husk that contains very caustic sap. The nut must be carefully roasted to destroy the sap -- it cannot safely be consumed raw. Above the nut grows a fruit, shaped like a pear, called marañon, yellow to red in color. The juice of the fruit is very astringent and is mostly used to treat sore throats, rarely as a beverage. Since the tree is prized for the nut, the fruit is available free. It makes an excellent wine, comparable in quality to any white wine made from grapes. The wine carries none of the astringent quality of the fruit juice but does have a pleasant and moderately complex taste.

    I obtained my winemaking supplies through the mail. I had plastic bags from one to five gallons of capacity, wine locks, yeasts, chemicals to sterilize the containers and juices and an instrument to measure the sugar content of the juice. I usually sterilized my juice as I blended up the fruit and mixed in the sugar, aiming for a concentration that would produce about 9% alcohol in the finished product. This is very conservative and many people try to push their wines as high as 14% alcohol, producing a sweeter, harsher product. Wines with more alcohol might age better, but I never planned to age my wines for more than 60 days anyway, with many being opened after just 30 days. Nor did I bother with trying to bottle my wines. We served them directly from the aging bags.

    I'm getting ahead of myself. After the mix was set up to the proper concentration, I had to wait about half an hour for the sterilization chemical to evaporate, then add the yeast, mix well, and seal the bottle with a wine lock. A wine lock is a device with a water seal that allows gas to escape from the jug without allowing air to enter. The yeast produces large quantities of carbon dioxide as it converts the sugar to alcohol, mostly in the first three to five days (depending on temperature and the chemistry of the fruit). When gas production drops off, the wine lock is replaced with a cap. This is where a plastic bag is a real advantage: when you remove the wine lock, you can slowly squeeze out the remaining air from the bag while capping it, simultaneously keeping air from entering and giving the wine room to expand if more gas is generated. You write the date of each operation on a paper tag on the neck of the bag and, when the wine has aged enough, you find an excuse to invite people over to taste it.

    It is legal to make wine and beer. You can make up to 200 gallons per household per year, I think. That's for consumption, not for sale. Four gallons per week should be enough for most families. It is very easy to make good wine, especially if you like to experiment.

  • Letting Go


    A few days ago, the other James had an entry that mentioned letting go. I made a concise and probably cryptic reply, partly because I was rushed, and went on to other things ... but my mind got hung up on that topic. I've visited that topic before, and it's bigger than it seems.

    I'm a Julia Cameron fan. She first introduced me to the topic of letting go in her workbook "The Artist's Way". There she introduced the idea of identifying and eliminating toxic friends, the people who are constantly bugging you for help and favors above and beyond reason. You can't lead any kind of normal life of your own while trying to satisfy these insatiable creatures, so you must get rid of them and go on with living. It isn't easy, but it is rewarding.

    Another form of letting go taught in that book was forgiveness. You must first forgive yourself for whatever you consider your shortcomings, then you must forgive everybody else in your life who has any kind of a hold on you. In many cases, the simple act of forgiving somebody will set you free from emotional bonds you didn't realize were holding you back.

    One of her workbooks that I freely admit having done little with (because I'm just a little afraid to explore my own spirituality) is "God Is No Laughing Matter". I attend classes that explore why human beings alone have developed spiritual feelings, doubts and fears that seem to have come with the capability for language itself. But, for the moment, I prefer not to look too closely at my own beliefs.

    On the other hand, I would feel remiss if I didn't pick up "The Right to Write" once in a while, if only to browse. Writing is, in many ways, the exploration of risks. One of the hardest things about writing is that the more personally the writer feels the emotion of the story, the harder it is to put the words on paper. The trite comes easy. Becoming remote enough from a good story to be able to tell it at all sometimes requires special tools and techniques. But that's more a matter of honing my tools than letting go of anything.

    It was with the theme of letting go in mind that I put on the DVD of "Fellowship of the Ring" this afternoon. The really striking example there was Bilbo's dropping the ring despite his very obvious desire to continue to keep it (or the ring's desire to remain in his possession). He not only let go of the ring, he also walked away from the life and community he had known for 111 years. It wasn't just retirement and it wasn't easy.

    Frodo twice let go of a comfortable life in the name of duty. Bilbo had left him a fortune. He could have lived comfortably in Hobbiton. But when Gandalf pointed out that the presence of the ring in the Shire would bring disaster, Frodo packed up and left everything behind. Then, later, he gave up his chance of going back to the Shire to offer to take the ring into Mordor and attempt to destroy it. He twice let go of everything he had or would have for the sake of others.

    And the elves were leaving Middle Earth, departing for the Grey Havens over the Western Sea where no ordinary boat could sail. They saw the time of the immortals as having passed and were leaving Middle Earth to mortal creatures, mostly man.

    In each case, letting go was seen as a traumatic but necessary step in order to accomplish necessary development. It was accompanied by both melancholy and anticipation, by hope and fear.

    Those of you with children know that letting them go is one of the hardest and most rewarding parts of raising them.

  • Hammered!



    Perhaps Even Nailed


    You are sleeping in the most secure place possible, below one of your many palaces in a reinforced concrete bunker several floors below the surface. This is one of many such places you have prepared, and you move from one to another in secret to that your enemy won't know which one you're in.

    Unknown to you, your enemy has learned where you are sleeping tonight. It takes him several hours to program and prepare his weapons and to get everything in place. Then, almost simultaneously, a series of cruise missiles blow away the superstructure of the palace, clearing the way for the two big bombs that are coming.

    These bombs are designed to penetrate several layers of reinforced concrete, waiting long enough to guarantee that they have penetrated as far as possible before the 2,000 pounds of explosive are detonated. First one, then the other.

    Did the second bomb wait for the first to complete its mission, then follow in the wake of the destruction it caused to dig even deeper? It is possible. These bombs are capable of that kind of precision.

    Did you wake to the unbearable concussion, the flash and flames, the indescribable noise, sudden heat, choking dust and fumes and searing pain, only to have it repeated moments later? Did you wake at all?

  • Inappropriate Four Letter Word


    I replaced our answering machine a couple of days ago with a new machine. The old machine lasted a dozen years and was a gift from a greatful long distance provider for all of our overseas long distance calls. It used a little cassette that kept falling out whenever the machine was dropped or bumped. The cord was short and noisy, picking up signals from local radio stations as well as buzzing, clicking and other annoying noises. There was storage for a total of twelve numbers.

    The new machine has digital answering capabilities, allowing individual messages to be erased. The handset is wireless. The base has a speakerphone with storage for eleven numbers while the handset will store fifty numbers. The cord limitations are gone.

    It was while I was storing numbers in the handset memory that I realized that the term "dial" is inappropriate. Most young people haven't seen a real dial telephone, where the number to be called is selected by sticking your finger in one of ten holes in a wheel on the front of the machine and rotating the wheel clockwise until your finger reaches a stop, then removing your finger, repeating this action for each digit of the number to be called.

    That is dialing. Punching buttons is something else but we still call it dialing.

    To "dial" on the new handset, you punch an arrow button to activate the directory, then punch it repeatedly until you see the name you want to connect to displayed on the screen, then you punch the 'select' button. The handset then gives you three options: dial, edit or erase. To connect to your chosen name, you simply punch the select button once more.

    If we don't call it dialing, what should we call it. Our language has once more fallen behind our technology.

    This year they are selling phones that resemble the phones of long ago but their dials have buttons on them instead of real dials. Our phone system will no longer accept the regularly spaced clicks produced by a mechanical rotary dial. Your kids will probably only see real dial phones in museums ... or on eBay.

    When I was young, we had an eight party line for our phone. There was no dial on that first phone. We picked up the handset and waited until the operator spoke to us. If the operator didn't respond in a reasonable time, we thumped the cradle a couple of times, which caused a very loud clicking noise in the operator's headphones, getting her attention but often making her irate (operators were almost exclusively female, for some reason).

    We said we were calling someone or making a call. We didn't start dialing until much later. We've only been dialing for about fifty years.

    I guess it's a lost art.

  • The Power of Google


    The search engine Google is a powerful tool. That makes it a neat toy. It's always fun to search on your own name.

    A search on "WordJames" comes up with about 270 hits, the first 22 of which are shown. The first one is my Xanga Weblog. The rest are all mine, some of them very obscure or very old.

    Searching on "Am0" came up with many thousands of hits, mostly in Japanese although there were some in Arabic, Swedish, German, Italian and other languages. Limiting the search to English cut the number of hits to 4,800. Number one was my Xanga site. I hit another reference to me at about number 278.

    Many of the sites were concerned with space. It turns out that the abbreviation "AM0" stands for "Air Mass Zero" or vacuum. It also stands for the solar radiation above the atmosphere, where "AM1" is the solar radiation at the surface at the equator.

    For some reason, "AM0" also stands for Application Mathematics. In meteorology it seems to refer to an Air Mass condition.

    I have no doubt that about 20 of those 4,800 entries refer to something I've done on the Internet but I don't have the patience to check them all out.

  • Crackers


    Crackers, mistakenly called hackers by the press, have become the bane of ISPs (Internet Service Providers) and Web Hosting Servers. It's hard to stay in business when malicious jerks break in to your machines and wreck your system. As a customer, I've had it happen to several of the systems I've tried using. One of those systems disappeared completely, never to be heard of again. Major corporations have gone bankrupt from having their servers cracked.

    I just started using a new Web host. They have a total of four servers and are about to bring another new server online. They placed me on server #4. Guess which one got cracked.

    Oh, well. It has worked part of the time, enough for me to get my foot in the door with a number of technologies I haven't been able to try before, including PHP and MySQL. Like an iceberg, most of my site is invisible to the public. It might be months before I reveal my efforts, if ever. It is my classroom.

    So being cracked was only a minor nuisance to me.

    The company sent me a message today, explaining what happened. They have continuing problems, particularly with email, and have called in some experts. Quite possibly they will migrate people on the crippled system to the new server when it becomes available, then clean off and reinstall server #4. Those of us on the damaged server will have our contracts extended for an additional month to make up for the inconvenience.

    Make no mistake, this is a serious problem for some users. People put their small businesses on these servers. The cracking took place a week ago -- and that's a long time for a business to have problems. I'm over 95% of my own customer base, so even an extended outage doesn't bother me that much.

    It's war.

  • What's Zope, Doc?


    I wanted to attend the LPSG (Linux Programmers' Study Group) this evening but I had transportation problems. Cathy's car is being worked on yet again by the same company that messed it up the last time, following her accident, trying to fix the things they missed. To get to work, she had to take my car. Delia had to work, too, leaving me without transportation to the meeting site, the San Diego County Department of Education complex. When Cathy called to tell me she would arrive some time after 18:00, I told her not to bother ... I would rather skip the meeting.

    However, Delia showed up unexpectedly at 17:25, allowing me plenty of time to get there. So I went.

    The object (or subject) of the meeting tonight was to form a new group specializing in the programming language Python. For those of you non-programmers who have bothered to read this far, the language is not named after the big snake; it is named after Monty Python's Flying Circus. There is a very good reason for the name: you can expect the language to do strange things.

    At least 14 people drifted in and out of the room during the 2.5 hours it was reserved, some staying the full time. At least four of the group program in Python regularly and could probably teach the rest of us about it. There were a few non-programmers there, including the KPLUG (Kernel Panic Linux User's Group) president, who is a Systems Administrator. I probably count as a non-programmer, too, through lack of practice.

    The group has a name, SandPyt, the last syllable pronounced as if written "pit". It is supposed to have a Web page or Wiki and may well have one by this time. SandPyt will take one of LPSG's two monthly meeting dates, but LPSG wasn't meeting that regularly anyway and won't miss it when they drop to once a month. There was some joking that the night SandPyt got conflicts with the meeting of the Extreme Programming group, but it is unlikely that anybody interested in WinXP would be interested in Python anyway.

    Oh, and what is Zope, you ask? Zope is a Web server or application server (or both) based on Python. That is, you can substitute Zope for Apache, for PHP, or for both, or you can use them all together. Zope is friendly. One of the people at the meeting was a Zope expert.

    A similar product, WebWare, was represented by one or two of the group, I'm not really sure. Only one of them did much talking. I get the impression that WebWare is pure Python while Zope is written partly in C or other languages, but I'm not really sure.

    Other similar products, such as SkunkWorks and Cougar, were mentioned but not represented. Either Zope or WebWare would be enough for me, I'm sure.

    I did want to mention a Python program that I use almost daily, PySol. It is a Solitaire game written in Python and it has grown over the years to include a fantastic number of card games. The only one I play is FreeCell, though. I waste lots of time with it.